The Sag Harbor Express
August 21, 2003

The Women of Herstory Write of Tough Times and Labors of Love
by Annette Hinkle

People engage in memoir writing for any number of reasons -a desire to share a story that may help others, a need to work through a personal tragedy or to document a historic event.

Since 1996, through the Herstory Writing Workshop, led by Sag Harbor novelist Erika Duncan, a revolving group of women of all ages, ethnic groups and backgrounds have been meeting weekly to share - and perfect - their stories. And the reasons for writing are as varied and unique as the women themselves. To date, 12 first draft books have been completed by Herstory members.

This Sunday, August 24, members of the Herstory Writers Workshop, which meets at the Cultural Center in Southampton as well as three other locations in Suffolk County, will be at Cormaria Retreat House in Sag Harbor from 12:30 to 3:30 p.m. to share selections from their work. The event is a benefit for the workshop and tickets are $35, which includes a brunch prepared by the women of Herstory.

Southampton's Stacy Quarty has been with Herstory for two years and from the beginning, her reason for joining was clearly defined.

"I knew I was going to write a book," says Quarty, whose final product "Frankly Pregnant" is a week by week account of surviving the 10 months (yes, when you do the math, it really is 10 months) of pregnancy. Quarty, a mom and a graphic designer with boundless energy, is also a key organizer of Sunday's benefit.

Quarty came up with the idea for her book shortly after 9/11 when her graphic design career took a nosedive. At home with a two year old and newly pregnant, Quarty, who had always wanted to write a book, realized the ideal topic was right under her nose, so to speak.

"With my first child, I wish I had a girlfriend who was pregnant at the same time who I could ask, 'Are you feeling this?'" explains Quarty, whose book comes complete with insiders anecdotes and rarely discussed pregnancy unpleasantries.

"When I came to Herstory, I had started the first couple chapters," she says. "I had the concept, but needed some shaping to find my voice. It was loose and messy, but all the women were so supportive."

Quarty's second daughter was born on July 15, 2002, but she continued to nurture her "other" baby (the book) for another year. At this point, Quarty has shown her completed book to an editor and is now in the process of developing marketing materials and a website to help sell it.

"I've been researching like crazy and picking the brains of everyone I know in the publishing world," says Quarty. "There's nothing like it on the market at all."

In the meantime, Quarty is already at work on her second book.

"I'm not discussing the subject yet," she says. "All the women in the group know what's it about. But I'm confident they won't tell."

Sag Harbor's Pat Gorman, who has been with the Southampton Herstory group for five years, will open Sunday's reading with a Native American drumming ceremony that represents the emotional heart of her story. As a Herstory writer, Gorman is among those who are furthest along in the process. Although she completed her book some three years ago ("Now I know that means 'first draft,'" says Gorman) she has been refining it ever since and feels that finally, it is nearly ready for submission to publishers.

"This is why everyone's first book is so good," she adds. "They spend ten years on it. About five of us are in the intensive state, finishing the second or third draft. Two have agents already."

"But were doing this for the writing," she notes. "Not because we necessarily want to publish it."

With flowing red hair adorned by a feather, today, Gorman is the picture of a woman who has come to terms with her identity (her mother was of Irish descent and her father, half Sioux Indian raised on the Rosebud Reservation in South Dakota). But it wasn't always so. Growing up in a family that totally denied the Native American heritage (despite the fact her father taught her Indian dances in the backyard of their Queens home decorated with hand woven baskets and rugs) Gorman, like her story itself, has evolved greatly over the years.

"I'm going to do a ceremony on Sunday and will wear some of my father's feathers and things," explains Gorman. "I'll use his little drum. This is about coming out of the closet."

Gorman's father died of emphysema in 1971, and there's a good chance she may never have come to terms with her Sioux side had it not been for a rare American Indian illness that first affected her eight years age - a type of blood arthritis that is antigen based. The illness is specific to northern plains tribes and, ironically, involves the white blood cells attacking the red blood cells. The disease is often fatal within two to five years.

"When I wrote the book, I thought it was all about my life. But when I finished it, I realized that's not what it was about at all," explains Gorman. "I go to live with a shaman in Mexico and it's really about becoming an Indian inside. I had to eviscerate the middle. Nobody needed to hear about my boyfriends or my career as a graphic designer. You didn't need to know that."

"I also had to change the book so in the beginning, I let you see how disconnected from that heritage I am," adds Gorman who adds that the support she received from the other members of Herstory as well as leader Erika Duncan and Linda Coleman, who also teaches, has been vital to her writing.

"I would've never written this without Herstory," she says. "I don't trust my own skills enough. You get phenomenal feedback. The great thing about Erika and Linda is that they don't interfere with theme, creativity or approach. They try to make you a good writer within the context of what you're working through."

"The whole idea of a memoir is to get into others' shoes, feel what they're feeling and experience what they're experiencing. Here in this group you've got to convince them that what your writing is your emotional or actual truth."

"Sometimes I would be so sick going to class, but the next day I'd feel better," adds Gorman. "I think Herstory is a big part of it. It let me face the origins of the illness. Unless I faced that, I couldn't get better. How do you get better when you're in denial? It's like saying the spiritual and physical are not connected. I'm an acupuncturist I know that. Dying people have nothing to hide anymore. I felt the same way. I have to do what I saw my patients do, I have to be brave. I know I'm getting better."

For North Haven's Lovelady Powell, joining Herstory was a way to help her deal with the painful loss of her partner of 35 years, Peggy White. Powell, who will read at Sunday's benefit, has been with the workshop for a year and a half, and while she has gotten very good at putting her thoughts on paper, she is reluctant to use the "B" word in describing her work.

"I'm not sure what it is yet," says Powell. "It has a journal feeling about it. I don't say I'm writing a book. That seems a bit pushy. I said in class its almost like a movie scenario."

"Having been in theater and spending my whole life as a professional, I needed a creative outlet after losing my partner," explains Powell, who was encouraged to join the group by her therapist. "I've Learned to be open and not edit what I feel."

"Believe me, aside from some journal writing, I've never been a writer at all," she adds. "But Erika is a fabulous teacher. By osmosis you get her message. Everybody is so supportive of each other. It's a serious class we're not just playing games. I started and about three weeks later, I said 'Erika I don't think I'm good enough.' She said, 'Stop that. What you have is your own style.' It's been wonderful and I'm learning a lot."

Powell is writing about her life as an actress working in clubs, on Broadway, in films and on TV, her meeting of Peggy White, a model, and their move to Sag Harbor in the late '70s where they bought a store on Madison Street and opened "The Glad Hand" a little antique store.

"Through the writing, I've been able to be personal, not sentimental. I've been able to give this gift to Peggy, to tell who she is. I write about the joy and laughter and the way we lived."

"I was raised to never complain and keep up a good face," adds Powell. "You didn't lay anything dark on anyone. I'm 73 and I've learned at this point, that's a waste of time."

"I'm glad to be able to be a part of this, but sometimes, I worry I'll have to leave the class. At certain stages what I'm writing about at the end of Peggy's life is hard."

Erika Duncan is now offering a once a month day-long Herstory workshop at her home in Sag Harbor. The next scheduled meeting will be Saturday, September 13 from 10 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. Subsequent meetings will take place on the second Saturday of each month. The cost is $80 at the door ($75 pre-registered) and there are a limited number of scholarships available. For more information, call 725-3177 or visit: www.herstorywriters.org.*

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*All Herstory Writer's Workshop web design and print promotional materials designed and donated by Stacy Quarty.